Trump’s Re-election Is Like Being Back at Grade School

except this time the bullies are running the show Don't let Republicans see you cry. It just encourages them. OK, I admit it. I was triggered. What a reckoning for my self-esteem! I thought I was the big, strong, manly type, stiff upper lip, a very major model of a modern homosexual, but ever since … Continue reading Trump’s Re-election Is Like Being Back at Grade School

Battle Hymn of the New Republic

the times, they are a-changin’… So Many Proud Boys I hate those PC leftiesOur freedom is destroyed By forcing that inclusive wordDisgruntled white guys feel absurd What’s wrong with good ol’ fashioned namesOur ancestors deployed? CHORUS: My daddy is a Redneck,My mother is a hagMy sister, she’s a cripple andHer first-born is a fag It’s tragic … Continue reading Battle Hymn of the New Republic

How Kamala Screwed the Pooch

From a three-syllable name to building bridges, the Dem nominee just couldn't connect with the real America When you experience life-altering trauma, for example, the sudden realisation that the universe is ruled by lizard people who've taken over the bodies of your friends and family; learning via billboards that are only visible to you that … Continue reading How Kamala Screwed the Pooch

Proverbs of Post-Truth Heaven & Hell

+PLUS+ Angelic Visions ANGELIC VISIONS When William Blake was a young lad, he saw trees filled with angels radiating light. I mean to say, more than once. Regularly. When he was a bit older, his brother, Robert, often dropped in to give him useful advice about his magnificent celestial art and his mysterious visionary poetry, … Continue reading Proverbs of Post-Truth Heaven & Hell

So You Wanna Have a Gay Orgy

Better disasters through planning You're in the dead zone, that stretch of time somewhere between 2AM and dawn, when normal lovers of every configuration, from par-for-the-course to unimagined, are enjoying the sweaty fulfillment of eagerly-anticipated dates made early the previous evening, or even, in cases of terminal normality, entire days in advance. You, on the … Continue reading So You Wanna Have a Gay Orgy

Joy to the World, Unless You’re Dead

In which case, congratulations Merry Coronadays, readers! Are you dead yet? No? What’s holding you up, and what can I do to encourage you? Because the latest stats show that you should be, with a standard deviation of ±3 percentage points. Get with the program and do your part, so everyone can be right about … Continue reading Joy to the World, Unless You’re Dead

Skipping Rhymes for Gen-Z, #2

Forget the Plague, the next gen has to process less-predictable horrors HERE I AM, STILL UNDERCOVER at the Acme Prep School, disguising myself with chocolate milk moustaches, playing with Dinky Toys at recess and praying the Grade Ones to Eights don't notice. The things I do for this blog! If I have to choke down … Continue reading Skipping Rhymes for Gen-Z, #2

I’m Just So Very Much NOT Hysterical About Notre-Dame de Paris

Let's burn the rest of them down, too. Please—don't pray for us. YES, GENTLE READERS, TODAY'S THEME IS "disasters, real or imagined" and to kick off, I must apologize for my absence from these bloggy parts during the last few weeks. You know how much I crave your attention, and the very quickest among you … Continue reading I’m Just So Very Much NOT Hysterical About Notre-Dame de Paris

If I had any idea who Tucker Carlson was…

... I'd probably be ashamed to admit it. As I was lounging on my balcony this evening, listlessly picking at the plate of shoestring potatoes I'd prepared for myself, and watching the rainy wind plaster shredded pieces of tissue, and pages from NOW Magazine covered with pictures of naked women, and empty Cheetos bags onto … Continue reading If I had any idea who Tucker Carlson was…

Serious two-bite brownie habit

David discovers homophobia under the right's opposition to the Ontario sex education curriculum; and wonders if the AIDS crisis of the '80's and the death of an older generation of gay male mentors is the real reason for a douchebag generation of the sexually awful.