A brief chocolatey interlude

while I try not to fret about everything falling apart like a wet cardboard box. Facebook Life Event: Inventor of the Two-Bite Brownie Multiple Oh, Yeah It came to me in a gush of warm, velvety creaminess that enveloped my face. It was //NOT ENOUGH// to enjoy an entire pack of Two-Bite Brownies //OR// anContinue reading “A brief chocolatey interlude”

From My Squalid Kitchen: Episode 6—Mature Mayonnaise Marathon

UPDATE: I received this heartfelt email from a “fan”: “ Dear Wannabe Film Maker Who Can’t Even Operate His Smartphone: Me and a couple of other male colleagues booked maternity leave so we could watch your “Mayonnaise” epic, which clocked in at 20 minutes of nothing but you stirring an egg in a bowl. TalkContinue reading “From My Squalid Kitchen: Episode 6—Mature Mayonnaise Marathon”

From My Squalid Kitchen, Episode 3

Kraft Dinner With Building Manager Garnish. When you’re fighting eviction, the simplest solution is to make a meal of your enemy.  It helps that we now have Google Translate, so we can curse them in their native tongue, in this case, Russian. Dear Mr P: May your blinis be always too thick!! Пусть ваши блиныContinue reading “From My Squalid Kitchen, Episode 3”

From My Squalid Kitchen: Episode 2

“Let them eat cake.  In bed.  While gossiping.” [vimeo 236272323 w=640 h=360]   You didn’t ask for it, and here it is! Episode 2 of the series that’s making a big splash! If you spend, like, a lot of time in a wading pool with your inflatable shark and a Collector’s Edition “Aqua Diver Barbie”.Continue reading “From My Squalid Kitchen: Episode 2”