So I dropped the 5-lb spinach and ricotta cheese lasagna I was struggling with and about to put in the oven and forwarded this post. Two big things that now need fixing: 1. What to have for dinner, and 2. Several large pieces of white porcelain embedded in my feet.
That lasagna is like, so totally?! Over!!??
Yes, I have too much time on my hands. But no lasagna on my hands. That cannot be ignored, not even by me, with my Ph.D. in procrastination from the University of Dave and my two-sizes-too-big terrycloth replica of Jackie Kennedy’s Dallas motorcade pink Chanel suit.
I have been accused of trolling the Innernet. Troll! Feh! Which I’m pretty sure is Latin for “well, I never!” Listen, you may call it “trolling”, my stern little mistress of the punishment ballet that is my online existence. I call it “staycation”. And what do you call a troll who trolls the trolls? Huh?
Yeah, well. Take another Vicodin and get back to me on that one, why don’t you?
Now could god skip my blessing before he kills me with his kindness and his mysterious ways and please move on to the Zika virus and trumpismus and that ferry filled with women and children that’s always sinking in the Indian Ocean.
People! god’s message is simple and totally like awesome!!?? You are being tested! Don’t get on the friggin’ ferry. OK? Don’t catch a virus and don’t add to the sum total of the world’s trumpismus.
Which are all ways of saying the same thing.
Beautiful Fluttering Butterfly Sparkly Totally Awesome??!! Thought for the day:
I could eat an entire bag of igneous rocks fresh from the volcano and still not understand people.